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Scenes We'd Like To See: Series 10, Episode 8
The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the eighth episode of the tenth series. Key * HD - Hugh Dennis * CA - Chris Addison * CD - Carl Donnelly * AP - Andy Parsons * AV - Ava Vidal * MJ - Miles Jupp Topics Unlikely Lines From a Horror Film AV - You've got a flat screen TV and brand new trainers. I know what you did last summer. AP - AAAH! AAAAH! I'm sorry, it's just that you look nothing like your photo on Match.com. MJ - Is there anybody there? Can you hear me? Is there anybody there? This is The Christian O'Connell Breakfast Show. CD - (Zombie-like moaning) That was Mayor Boris Johnson with his official statement on the riots. HD - Have you seen the traffic? It's a nightmare on Elm Street. CA - And now, Alan Bennett's long awaited remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Nantwich Leafblower Kerfuffle. HD - What do you want? What do you want? No! I'm not paying too much for my car insurance. AV - I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. So I gave Mark's dinner party an 8. CD - Do you like scary movies Sidney? Oh sorry, is Sidney there, please? AP - If you don't keep up payments to your exorcist, there's a danger your home may become repossessed. CA - Ha! Joke's on you Dracula, I've got AIDS. MJ - I ate his liver with some jelly beans and a nice Um Bungo. AP - I've seen the ring! I wish that builder would pull his trousers up! HD - I don't have to listen to you, you're just a puppet. If you don't shut up, I'm going to put you back in you box, Mr. Clegg. MJ - I'm afraid he's been bitten by a George Michael. He's turned into a Whampire. Commercials that Never Made it to Air MJ - Have you got a WKD side? Then you're a prick. CA - Take two bottles into the shower? Not anymore, I've got a proper dildo. AP - JD Sports: 2000 looters can't be wrong. CA - Do you suffer from dull, lifeless hair? Don't worry, Andy Parsons will buy it off you. HD - With ABS sat-nav and airbags, this may be the most advanced condom you ever buy. AP - How much did you say you earned for those DirectLine car insurance adverts? Well, people deserve to hear about this! Honk! Honk! Honk! Honk! HD - Dara O Briain: We work, so he doesn't have to. MJ - Cash for Cash: Send us your cash in an envelope, and we'll send it back minus commission. CD - Every year, thousands of bears are captured, tortured, and forced to dance in front of crowds of cheering people. Call 0845 now for ticket hotline. AP - Ash for Cash: Put your cremated relatives in an envelope... HD - Got that bloated feeling? My uncle had that, he was dead in a week. AP - Smash for Cash: Put in mashed potato in an envelope... AV - Don't just book it, Thomas Cook it. Dignitas in Switzerland HD - Why have we got barbecues at low, low prices? Because the summer's been shit and no one's brought them! MJ - At the Dogs Trust, we never put down a healthy dog. But the minute one coughs, it's in the Thames. CA - Do you suffer from unsightly chest hair? Should've gone to Pecshavers. MJ - Lynx: Come on virgins, wash your cocks. AP - (waits while audience keeps laughing, looks around, then shrugs and walks off) Category:Scenes We'd Like To See